"there is a family style of not blaming when things go wrong."
when I see a sentence in Zhihu, I take it for granted:
our temper is always easy to spread on our loved ones, and the only object of our anger is our loved ones.
Why?
in fact, the answer is very simple, because others, no one can put up with you.
the reason why we are impatient with life, in fact, is largely because there is pain in our hearts, and no one understands it.
the more angry, the more out of control, the more angry, so that it has been circulating, so that it hurts the people around us without knowing it.
Let others be afraid of you, it is not the ability to be careful with you;
Let others care for you, take care of you is great.
01
scolding when something happens
Tagore says:
strike a person and never praise a person, which is easy for people to accept;
scold a person, never in a kind tone, and make people feel at ease.
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Don't do to others what you don't want to do to others. We can't empathize with each other, but we can be understanding and tolerant.
if two people are often critical of each other and always complain about life, the accumulation of negative energy in life will not only make each other unhappy, but also reduce each other's happiness.
blame others, the most painful is not others, but yourself.
because when we blame others, we are in a sad mood, which accumulates in the bottom of our hearts, and the most painful thing is not each other, but ourselves.
less blame, don't worry about trifles, discuss big things more, live an optimistic life, and have positive contacts can make our family harmonious and prosperous with each passing day.
02
when something goes wrong, not blaming each other is to maintain each other's armor
between husband and wife, we are equal, no one is one's servant, no one is another's handmaid.
it's not that the other person can't live without us, but that we need each other to fill the gaps in our lives.
husband and wife are not only the nearest audience, but also the ones who accompany us for the longest time. What they need is encouragement and treasure, not always picking and criticizing.
something happens, if we only care about the harm it brings to us, without considering each other's mood, it's easy to get angry, complain, get angry, and even get hysterical.
but have you ever thought that if you can't tolerate him, who will tolerate him in this society?
partners need to support each other, don't always hit each other.
it all depends on your attitude whether you choose to regard the other person as an enemy or a bosom friend.
who is your partner?
is our pillow, the best person to us in the world.
he has his own weaknesses, and what we need to do is his armor, not the bayonet that hurts him the most.
03
Don't blame when something goes wrong.
Zhou Guoping said:
Home is a small boat that will carry us through such a long time.
in the long life, there are calm times, moments of sudden wind, many opportunities and many challenges.
the more wind and rain it is, the more we have to report to the regiment for warmth instead of blaming each other.
Home is always a place to talk about love, because it is warm when there is love, and it is long-term because it is heavy.
Don't make a big fight at the slightest move, and don't chatter because of the slightest deficiency of the other person.
if we want to love, we should give more love. If we want to praise, we should give more encouragement to each other. If we want to be happy, we should work hard to manage.
A good marriage is definitely not a marriage in flames of war, a good love, or a love that is constantly quarrelling.
Home is the harbor of the soul, not the prison of each other.
only when there is love at home, can we have the inheritance of love, and only when there is warmth at home can we warm the hearts of the people.
I hope every one of us can treat our family calmly and make the family calm and warm like spring!