The way parents live in the first half of their lives hides the fate of their children for the rest of their lives.

/June 2022


parents are the starting line for their children

some time ago, there was a hot search on the topic of # teaching strictly according to the zero starting point in the beginning of primary school.

many parents feel that the ideal is beautiful and the reality is cruel.

other people's children have already finished learning pinyin before they go to primary school, and their own children still stay in a, o, e; other people's children already have three years of learning experience in dance, music and painting, and their own children are still addicted to playing games and playing dolls.

there is some anxiety, which starts with "comparison".

every parent is trying to give their children the right to make more choices in life, hoping that they will have better connections, wider circles, more professional abilities, and that they can live better than themselves.

some time ago, in the hit drama "Thirty," Gu Jia took great pains to get her son into an aristocratic kindergarten. Recently, Zhang Zhizhi in "Dear self" is also the mother of her child's classmates, making her face swollen and fat, in order to give her daughter a better educational environment.

every parent is doing their best to provide everything they have to offer. After all, money is needed to support everything that involves their children.

parents are also increasingly becoming the starting line for their children. But money is definitely not the only thing that determines where the line lies.

there is an ancient folklore called "painting Di to teach children", which is about Ouyang Xiu's mother's way of educating her children.

Yes, it is Ouyang Xiu, the great writer in the Northern Song Dynasty.

he was born poor, his father died early, and only his mother raised him on her own.

Mother wants him to study very much, but she really has no money for him to go to school. She came up with an idea and taught him herself.

at that time, they could not even afford paper and pens, so they could only use grass stalks to write on the ground instead of paper and pens to teach their son to read.

Ouyang Xiu made a mistake, so his mother asked him to erase it and write it again and again, practicing it over and over again until he wrote neatly.

it was precisely because his mother taught him to read and write from an early age that Ouyang Xiu soon fell in love with poetry and developed the ability to recite through the eyes.

in order for Ouyang Xiu to broaden his horizons and read more good books, his mother often takes him to homes with a large collection of books to borrow books.

it was precisely because of the careful cultivation of his mother that Ouyang Xiu finally became a famous literary master in the Northern Song Dynasty.

A pair of good parents is worth a hundred good teachers.

when we beat up the fat people to earn high-quality educational resources for our children, can we think about whether we should try to set an example for our children instead of forcing ourselves to acquire things outside our abilities and circles?

what kind of person you want your child to be, give everything you can within the conditions, and supplement the rest with careful education and companionship.

after all, in the criteria of good parents, teaching by deeds and deeds is the top priority.

what you are, that's what your child is. No education has a more profound impact than family education.


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Children strive to be role models only if their parents live up to their role models

recently, Weibo and moments have both been viewed by Chen Wei, a 54-year-old Tsinghua goddess.

People's Daily commented on Chen Wei: "she is an academician and a soldier."

but what she is most proud of is not that she dared to "dance with the virus", but that as a mother, she lived out the best reference.

at that time, the 4-year-old boy, who was still worried about his mother, has now become the best graduate with a straight A, and his mother Chen Wei appears in every step of his son Ma Enhao's growth.

when he was in high school, he volunteered to volunteer in West Africa, becoming the only Chinese middle school student volunteer to aid Africa at the height of the Ebola epidemic.

in the third year of senior high school, in addition to preparing for the exam, I also participated in the National AIDS Prevention Foundation as a volunteer.

now, he chooses to be close to his mother and regards microbiology as his lifelong goal.

in fact, for Chen Wei, she does not give as much company to her children as ordinary mothers.

often went to various viral battles, Ma Enhao saw more of his mother's resolute back and unyielding spirit.

Mother's influence on her child is strong and far-reaching. When you become a role model, your child will not worry about taking detours.

A rich parent may not necessarily give birth to an excellent child, but a good parent will not have a bad child.

as Huang Shu-wen, a Taiwanese spiritual writer, said:

Chen Wei never asks too much of her children. her hopes for her children are very simple, with a good wife and a career worth fighting for.

she replaced the time and energy that most parents "forced" their children into encouraging their own life to move forward. On the one hand, she got the greatest improvement in ability, on the other hand, this kind of "free-range education" gave her children a great deal of respect.

many parents think that "free-range education" is too dangerous, and their children grow crooked when they are not careful. But "stocking" does not mean "undisciplined", it has two necessary prerequisites:

1 parents live as role models for their children, so that their children can see the power of hard work.

2 proper discipline and guidance, maximum respect for the scope of ability.

Yang Jiang said:

A good education is not to be taught passively, but to inspire the consciousness of learning and to be taught unconsciously.

when children see the power of role models, learn the way their parents live, do things and behave in their daily life, and understand the direction in which they can work hard, they will naturally be inspired to learn how to live and get used to it.To forge ahead.

it is the best choice for both parents and children to inspire their children with actions rather than discipline them with words.


educating children is a self-cultivation

remembering that there is a joke on the Internet:

one day, the mother crab said to the little crab, "son, why are you always crawling horizontally? why don't you go straight?"

the little crab replied aggrieved, "Mom, I walked like you."

in fact, educating children is a self-cultivation.

from a genetic point of view, children are almost replicas of their parents, and there are too many striking similarities in terms of body size and demeanor.

in addition to genetic factors, the potential impact of family ecosystem is also huge.

Why do we always emphasize that parents should lead by example?

living in the same home, only the closest parents can be seen and imitated by children.

if parents respect their elders and show filial piety to the elderly, their children will naturally understand the truth of order between children and children.

parents are not discouraged when they are frustrated at work and unremittingly look for various ways to save their mistakes. naturally, children will not be discouraged because of minor problems in their studies.

if parents spend their leisure time reading instead of playing with mobile phones, how can children be infatuated with online novels and games?


educator Sukhomlinski once said:

Children are a sensitive receiver, and the problems you see in children are a reflection of their own problems.

the behavior of parents is closely related to the growth of their children, so they can not be a shopkeeper, nor can they escape the first responsibility and obligation of their children's education.

the most important thing we should do is to regulate our daily words and deeds, rein in our bad temper, cultivate good habits, and influence our children by example step by step under the gap of time.

the way parents live in the first half of their lives will be the most profound reference for a child in adulthood, affecting him bit by bit for the rest of his life.

try to be the pride of your child. When you fall in love with learning, your child will be interested in learning. When you pursue your dream, your child will pursue your goal courageously.

people have been practicing all their lives. And educating children is the best practice.

grow up to be a better person with your children. This is the most profound meaning of education.