The greatest upbringing of a person is not politeness, not politeness, but...

/August 2022

in your opinion, what is a person's greatest accomplishment?

some people say that they treat people politely and do things with ease.

but in my opinion, it's more than that.

A person's self-cultivation is not only reflected in his words and deeds, but also hidden in his attitude when dealing with people.


treat others with leniency

Feng Zikai once said:

I think so. People with narrow hearts haggle over things, while people with broad hearts tolerate all things.

whether a person is cultured or not depends on how he treats the people around him.

there is a very popular video on the Internet:

in the restaurant, the waiter accidentally served the wrong food and gave it to Yu-Shiang Shredded Pork, who should have given it to another table.

the guests at this table saw this and clipped a chopstick as quickly as possible, so that the food that had been moved could not be changed to another table.

he ate free food with peace of mind, regardless of the bewildered waiter.

the waitress is new here. She made a mistake just two days after she arrived. She was very frightened.

I am worried that I will have to pay for this dish. I am even more worried about being scolded by my boss and losing my job.

at this time, another guest at this table quietly got up, turned his back and pulled the waiter aside:

"add it to the menu, and I'll pay for it."

when the waiter saw this, he thanked him again and again.

A word from the warm-hearted guest pulled her out of the predicament and saved her dignity.

in this life, no one can guarantee that he will not make mistakes, making it difficult for others as well as for himself.

it is better to relax and forgive others as well as yourself.

after all, life cannot be plain sailing, less concerned about personal gains and losses and more considerate of others.

only then can the road of life become wider and wider, and walk more and more steadily.


do things in order to be true

I have a friend who has shared my life experience.

the year she graduated from college, she took a fancy to a good company, but she was brushed down in the first round of group interview.

on the day of the interview, watching the conversation of the people around her, she felt not to mention how inferiority complex she felt.

after returning home, she began to study the interview experience behind closed doors and accumulate professional knowledge. her friends told her to eat and drink out, but she had to prepare well for the interview and refused.

many people say, it's just an interview, why bother?

but she doesn't think so.

in her view, the failure of the first interview is because she is not ready for it. To put it bluntly, it is not that the opponent is too strong, but that she is too weak.

since then, she has carefully studied the interview videos, strengthened her expression training, and checked the company's reports and media developments in recent years.

in another recruitment three months later, she successfully passed the interview and got a good offer.

in the years that followed, with this earnestness, she not only did a good job, but also got two promotions in three years.

those who advised her to "forget it" before were amazed at her achievements.

think of a debate in the strange theory: "will I lose if I take it seriously"?

one of the answers I like very much: you believe that "if you take it seriously, you lose" because you don't want to face the result that even if you are serious, you may still lose.

I think so.

most of the time, we prefer to muddle along passively for fear that our investment will not be rewarded.

but in this world, there has never been accidental success, and there is no fruit in vain.

only those who keep their feet on the ground and do things seriously can really achieve the success they want.

what people fear most in this life is the word "serious".


there is a good saying: between people, acquaintance depends on fate, getting along with each other depends on sincerity.

I remember a short story I read not long ago.

there is an elder who likes to promote his younger generation on weekdays. Although there are many difficulties and ulterior motives on the way to starting a business, he is still willing to teach him his past experience.

on one occasion, he invited several people with good performance in the company to travel, and one of them was a quiet guy who was silent all the way, just listening to their discussion.

his predecessors are not disturbed, leaving him to be a loner.

once when I was resting on the beach, I came across a high tide.

the elder happened to take a nap without noticing and was almost involved in the river.

at this time, I saw these fellow travelers shouting for help while preparing to seize the belongings of their predecessors.

the other ran ashore as soon as the tide came in, looking coldly at what was happening in front of him.

only this inarticulate young man took the elder by the hand, dragged him to the shoal and dragged him ashore, which saved his life.

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after the event, the elder was grateful and became the guide on the way.

many people were puzzled and asked him why this was the case. the elder said that he had met a lot of people and experienced a lot of things in his life, but it was only when the wind and waves hit that they found that those around him who had sworn to follow them had already run more than half of them.

the boy was the only one who came forward at that time. He appreciated the boy's kind character, so he was willing to share more resources with him.

the elder said that he appreciated the boy's calm in the face of danger, and paid more attention to the quality of the boy's kindness and duty.

such conduct is hard to change.

looking back on our livesThe same is true.

Xi Xi in the world, all for profit, the world is bustling, all for benefit.

very few people are willing to be honest with others.

but in this life, who has few difficulties and who has few times of distress.

the truth is seen in adversity, and the heart is seen in the trough.


the most important thing in a person's life is to have an open-minded and frank heart, to be able to treat others attentively and to do things seriously.

only by paying attention to others, without calculation and tricks, is it possible to truly reap each other's sincerity.

only by paying attention to things, without perfunctory and prevarication, is it possible to live the life you want.