Parents who are undisciplined cannot raise good children.

/July 2022


the shadow of parents

I know two mothers, both housewives, but the children taught are very different.

A mother likes to gamble so much that the sound of mahjong is heard at home from morning till night, sometimes very lively in the middle of the night.

her child is in junior high school and never does his homework at home, because his parents don't care and his grades are a mess, and the teacher can't do anything about him.

I heard that the teacher has made several home visits to advise his parents to take care of their children, otherwise they won't even be able to go to high school.

there is also a mother whose family conditions are mediocre, but I once visited her house and saw that it was full of books.

she was worried that she had low academic qualifications and could not teach her children well, so she studied with her since the child was in primary school, pinching and saving money to buy all the books.

every weekend, there is a lot of noise in the mahjong house next door, and the child doesn't know where to hang out, but she is reading quietly with her daughter.

my daughter has been in the top three of her class since she was a child. She was admitted to a key high school last year, which is the pride of her family.

Yu Minhong said: if there is something wrong with the copy, it must be traced back to the original. In other words, the problems with the children are all reflected by the parents.

self-disciplined parents, their children basically do not like to be lazy.

it is difficult for parents who are not self-disciplined to raise conscious children.

parents' lack of self-discipline is quietly destroying the next generation.

the child is not healthy, and he may have been accustomed to the lazy and messy way of life since his parents.

the child's life is not satisfactory, and he may have developed the bad habit of fooling around and not wanting to make progress since his parents.

if even parents can't control themselves, don't expect their children to be self-disciplined.


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the most useless education is to constantly preach

it is a very fair thing to raise a child. The degree of attention of the parents determines the excellence of the child.

like the recommendation of planting flowers, how can there be a good harvest if you don't work silently and take good care of it?

in the face of their children's unconsciousness, lack of effort and lack of progress, parents hate iron and yell at their children:

go and do your homework!

go to bed!

while picking on the child, he is saying the big truth, instilling in the child's mind the importance of "self-discipline". He is still playing with his mobile phone and watching TV.

for the sake of others, if you are a child, do you find it persuasive?

Rousseau said:

Children are not aware of it, but parents only know how to preach, but they find it useless to reason and beat them up:

the first result: children do not listen to their parents' preaching at all. You tell me what I should do.

the second result: children hate their parents' preaching, produce rebellious psychology, and openly work against their parents.

the third result: children's apparent obedience, inner resistance, and their relationship with their parents are getting worse and worse.

everyone knows the truth, and so do children, but how can children accept it if parents have one set of standards for their children and another for themselves?

Children put their parents first, and children will do what parents do.

as the ancients said very well, "words are not as good as deeds." No matter how much you say, it is not as good as a simple demonstration of scolding children 100 times, it is better to take the lead.

parents should not always give their children a bad example of beating and scolding when they are angry. Actions tell their children much more than words.


Smart parents are role models for their children

every winter and summer vacation, parents lose tens of thousands of dollars in their wallets, either signing up for school or sending their children to summer camp.

"it feels like raising a child is raising a cash shredder."

parents are worried that their children will lose at the starting line and that their children will not be competitive in the future, so they are willing to spend a lot of money for their children.

however, numerous facts have proved that children who grow up in cram school interest classes are often not very good.

A study at Harvard University shows that

(8 factors highly related to student achievement)

(8 factors not related to student achievement)

the child is the shadow of the parents, and the child is the copy of the parents.

the behavior of children, for better or worse, is almost always the result of parental education and influence.

A mother who loves to dress up, most of her daughters also like to dress up;

A father who loves swearing, his son is also likely to behave rudely.

A child will not obey what an adult says, but he will certainly imitate an adult. This is the law of family education.

Confucius also said: "his body is upright, although he does not order but obey." His body is not upright, although it is ordered but not obeyed. "

educate the child. If you educate the child by action, the child will follow suit. If you educate the child with empty words, it will only lead to quarrels.

Smart parents know how to set a good example for their children.

just like Wu Yishu's father, in order to stay with his daughter, he turns off his cell phone after work every day.

under the influence of her father, Wu Yi-Shu doesn't like to play with her mobile phone in her spare time, but recite poems, read books and practice calligraphy.

what parents want their children to do, parents must do it first; what they want their children not to do, parents should not do it first.

what parents are is far more important than what they do for their children. Parents' words and deeds are the benchmark for their children.


the more self-disciplined parents are, the happier their children are

I have a friend who has been a head teacher for many years. Every time he has a parent-teacher meeting, he will observe.A parent.

he said: "for those parents who are well-managed, well-dressed and elegant, their children generally do well.

and those parents who are obviously out of shape, dress casually and speak vulgarity seldom raise excellent children.

their children tend to be mediocre, and even if their grades are passable, their words and deeds show petty manners. "

there is a good saying: the more self-discipline parents are, the happier their children are.

parents are their children's first teachers and permanent head teachers.

it is not teachers, not school education, but parents and family education that leave an indelible mark on children.

Jobs said, "where does freedom come from?" Confidence comes from self-confidence, and confidence comes from self-discipline! "

if you want your child to be free, you must let your child exercise self-discipline.

I want my child to be self-disciplined. First of all, he /she should be self-disciplined.

1. Develop good living habits.

parents live regularly and do things in an organized and planned way. where work is not procrastinated and entertainment is not addicted, children will learn the same and form good habits.

2. Abide by the basic social order.

parents abide by the law, abide by social morality, practice civilized norms, restrain themselves all the time, and assume social and family responsibilities.

Children will form a sense of rules, know right and wrong, good and evil, and know what to do and what not to do.

3. Maintain good moral character.

parents should be honest and trustworthy, tolerant and magnanimous, do not judge others at will, do not vent their emotions impulsively, set a good example for their children, and let their children have good moral qualities.

self-disciplined parents, even if they can not give their children the best life, but can let their children develop good conduct habits, these are the best gifts for their children.