No matter who you associate with, remember these 10 hidden social rules
"are you there"
when many people are looking for someone on Wechat, they are used to asking "are you there?"
although this is to be polite, no one really likes such opening remarks.
Adult time is precious. If you don't have time, I'll go back 800 times.
you have to say something before the other person can decide whether you are here or not.
so, after greeting, get down to business. If the other person doesn't reply for a long time, it means it can't be done.
if the other person replies "I'm sorry, I was busy" after a long time, you don't have to repeat it.
put aside the usual chat, give each other a step, keep thoughtfulness and face.
"I'll go back and think about"
"how are you thinking about this project?" "I'll discuss it with my wife."
"it's really cost-effective to sign up for the gym now." "I'll go back and think about it."
"would you like to go out for dinner this weekend?" "I'll see if I have time."
in fact, everyone knows the meaning behind this reply, and it's basically hopeless.
in the adult world, without a quick yes is an euphemistic refusal.
so stop asking questions, do you want to force others to come up with an excuse to reject you and cut off the infinite possibilities of cooperation in the future?
"it's a difficult thing to do."
it's hard to avoid asking for help when you're alive.
although sometimes they are either perfunctory or receive an ambiguous answer, "it's not easy to do this."
but congratulations, at least it means it can be done.
the greatest rule of interpersonal communication is mutual benefit.
to put it more colloquially, what to do with this matter depends on how much value you can give in exchange.
there is no free lunch, and no one will help you for no reason.
meet someone who is willing to help you, that is an honorable person.
if not, let's find a way to be strong and ask for help less.
"this is for your own good"
in life, there are too many people who kidnap others morally and guide others' lives under the banner of "for your own good".
but in most cases, these words are either addicted to their own mouth or have a hidden selfishness.
A friend who is really nice to you won't make you feel uncomfortable.
A friend who is really nice to you always does more than he says.
"I don't like to bother others"
I don't know when the people around me become more and more independent.
they follow the principle of "I don't like to bother others" and take matters into their own hands.
some people think that this mode of getting along with each other is very comfortable, but most people don't realize that another meaning of this sentence:
in fact, this is very normal. In the adult world, everyone is very busy. There is no room to help others without solving their own affairs.
therefore, one of the adult's self-cultivation is not to disturb and trouble others casually.
but more importantly, don't squander the kindness and kindness of others.
you should know that it is your duty for others to help you, and it is your duty not to help you.
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"in principle" is a very skillful and coquettish technique.
for people who are not familiar with it, "yes in principle" equals a disguised refusal.
to put it bluntly, we can do this in principle, but because we don't know each other well, or because I don't want to benefit you, why should I help you?
the same is true of "not allowed in principle".
that's what the rules say, but I'm willing to help you. There's room for flexibility in this matter.
people always want someone to accompany them when they are hurt, sad or in trouble.
but for some people, whenever you have something, you come and ask, "what's wrong with you?" you don't really care, but simply satisfy your curiosity or gossip.
so don't talk to others from the bottom of your heart as soon as they are nice. Tell the truth to those who deserve it.
but you should know that life is long, no one will be with you forever, you always have to go through a period of time of your own.
Learning to be silent is the strong beginning.
"have dinner together next time"
everyone has heard the words of "have dinner together next time", but no one cares about it.
he said that he would make an appointment next time, and he would have time to have dinner together later, and there would be no more news.
it's a bit of a pity, but in fact, we all know that good-byes for adults are always endless.
but life is short, and some people really miss it if they don't get in touch. So take advantage of the bright spring, go and see those you want to see.
"Don't wait for next time, just now, okay?"
"are you busy now?"
there is a suggestion on Weibo:
"when someone asks you if you are busy, say you are busy anyway."
because according to experience, if you say you are not busy, nine times out of ten the other person will keep you busy. "
indeed, "busy or not" in the workplace is a code word that is used very frequently.
usually the person who asks this sentence is not really inWhether you are busy or not, they just want to get a signal from you that they can help.
and you never know how troublesome it will be to be imposed on you, so don't rush to say yes.
but if the boss asks, it's a different matter.
"what are you doing?"
some people say that searching the words "what are you doing" in the Wechat chat log will tell who is secretly in love with you.
I just think it's funny at first, but that's true when I think about it.
No one will be idle to care about you, and people who like you won't always say "I love you".
they put thousands of words of concern and heartfelt love, typed and deleted, deleted and typed again and again in the dialog box, and finally turned into a cautious greeting:
quietly expressed the ups and downs of missing restrained and moving.
Wechat search for "what are you doing" to see who appears the most, whether it's a friend or lover, please cherish it.
well, these 10 hidden social rules are not clearly stated, but they are very important. I hope you and I both understand.