I've talked to thousands of women about marriage: ten priceless advice for married men
many men wonder what we women usually talk about together.
in fact, it's nothing. It's often the topic of "my husband is great".
for example, the last time A's husband cooked was 11 years ago. B's husband could not remember what grade the child was in. When C was in the month, her husband played games all night. When D had trouble with his mother-in-law, the husband always stood by his mother.
in short, we are all satisfied with you and lead a happy and carefree life.
OK. I'm not satisfied.
A consulting firm in the United States has conducted an in-depth survey of women from many countries, and the results show that Chinese women have the lowest marital satisfaction, with only 37% of women satisfied with their partners, while 73% of American women are satisfied.
as a relationship writer and counselor, I have talked to at least thousands of women about their marriages over the years.
I know that what makes Chinese women unhappy is not how bad and bad Chinese men are. On the contrary, most of you are self-motivated and responsible.
you're just. Too ignorant about women, too bad at running a marriage. Then where there is thunder, where to step on, how wrong how to come, make the day ups and downs.
so you need to hear about marriage more than women.
Please keep the following ten items.
give her enough love
Men often complain about women's materiality. when there is something wrong with their marriage, many people's first reaction is, "Don't you just think I'm poor?"
not at all.
the top three reasons for divorce are infidelity, domestic violence and personality discord.
Economic problems are rarely on the list.
therefore, poverty is not the reason why most women despair about marriage. They are poor and untreated.
material deficiency is not terrible, but spiritual grievance is fatal.
if you can give your wife enough love and treat her well enough, you are usually willing to earn money to support her.
she may be unhappy and resentful, but she is reluctant to leave you.
the foolishness of a woman is to cherish the sincerity of a man too much and lust too much for a man to be kind to her.
if you give you all the love and care you should give, she won't run away from eating bran and pharynx.
but. If you let others not only suffer from poverty, but also suffer from anger.
No money, no love, no warmth, no sense of security, no anything, then what does she want with you?
loyalty. Loyalty. Loyalty. Say important things three times
at the beginning of an intimate relationship, women generally have absolute trust in men.
the beautiful belief that I love you and believe that you love me is the cornerstone of a better life.
after that, she shakes this cornerstone every time she finds out that you are flirting, flirting or flirting with another woman.
if you shake too much, the relationship becomes dangerous.
of course, if it rises to infidelity, it will be absolutely devastating.
after so many years of counseling, I really haven't seen many women who don't care about their husbands having an affair.
but many men came to me after the affair, saying that they didn't think so much at that time, but now my wife doesn't forgive me endlessly. I don't want a divorce but I can't live any longer. I would have dared not play with fire if I had known this. Unfortunately, it's too late to regret it now.
Hmm. At first, they are all lucky, and in the end, they are all repentant.
the most heartbreaking word in the world is "it's too late to regret".
once a relationship is seriously hurt, once trust is destroyed, it is harder to repair it than to make a hundred million dollars.
so, if you are not ready for a divorce and are eager to challenge the red line, harvest it as soon as possible.
Mom and wife, you must do justice, do not run
have ever seen a stupid man.
when I first got married, my wife and mother had a little conflict, and they all told him in private that he was bored and whether you were tired of nagging about these nonsense all day long.
later, his wife became pregnant and there were more contradictions, so he simply hid at work and never came home.
when the baby was just full moon, mother-in-law and daughter-in-law got into each other one day.
then the wife went back to her mother's house with the baby in her arms and wanted a divorce.
his mother encouraged him to leave all day.
he doesn't want to leave. But I have to leave.
come to me and say, I sent them two words: deserve it.
I especially want to tell every married man this lesson:
when your wife and mother are in the wrong atmosphere, don't think it's okay to dive into the sand.
if the spark comes out, you won't be able to put it out, but if the fire burns, you won't be able to bear it.
remember, you are the fire extinguisher and firewall between those two women. Your inaction will hurt the whole family.
Please note that fire fighting is not about "will you stop being so stingy" and "she's like that, what can I do?"
is it possible that you can't handle your wife and count on your mother to take care of it?
your mother, you can't handle it. You can count on your wife to handle it. Is it possible?
as long as things exist and your anger does not go away, you must stand up for analysis, solution, and guidance.
because the days are long, if you don't get rid of one thing after another in time, it will explode sooner or later, or you will be blown up first.
dealing with the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, we can best see the level and responsibility of men.
treat your wife 10 times better than usual during pregnancy and delivery.
Women are the most vulnerable and bearable during pregnancy and delivery.The worst stage. Not intentionally hypocritical, she is such a psychophysiological state.
you may usually be good, but you have to let her go when she wants to have a C-section, so she hates you for the rest of her life.
Why do you think you need it?
originally, it was not easy for a woman to get pregnant and give birth, breast-feed and raise a baby.
she also has a child's 1max 2, and she works ten thousand times harder than you.
is there any reason why you should not be nice to her?
Why don't you provoke her when she is the weakest and weakest?
therefore, you should take good care of your wife during pregnancy and childbirth as well as a giant panda, and be careful not to step on mines.
take good care of your wife when you are pregnant, so that your wife can have a good time.
everything is obeyed when giving birth, and she can cut it smoothly if she wants to.
you must take good care of your son, talk with her more and make her happy.
key nodes should not be neglected to avoid future trouble.
wife's "angry when I think of it", solve it!
you have had an affair or had a deep affair with another woman, and your wife found that the situation was a mess, but now things have changed and things seem to have calmed down.
in fact, the thorn is probably still stuck in the wife's heart.
but you won't let her say it, and you get upset when you say it-"isn't it all over? is it over?"
so the thorn stabbed all the time.
you can't feel it, or pretend you don't know.
but your wife is upset. Her affliction must have compromised your intimate relationship.
if there are too many similar knots, if you don't solve them and don't let them say, the quality of your marriage must be very poor.
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your wife will be frustrated and angry from time to time.
therefore, stupid men always have bumps in their wives' hearts, and smart men should not allow their wives to have bumps in their hearts.
she's upset about your affair two years ago, so just let her talk. As soon as she says it, you apologize sincerely and behave well until she doesn't want to talk about it.
she regrets not taking wedding photos. OK, make it up. Don't reason with your neck straight. Everyone knows that no one can die without taking wedding photos, but that's what she's thinking about.
or don't wait for her to say, "wife, let's go and take a wedding photo. I always felt sorry for you when I didn't take it."
she must be very happy.
two people walk all their lives, and they have to clean up the rubbish while walking, so that they can feel free and happy in the end.
and this requires the ability to think of others and the courage to face difficult problems.
Don't be a "deaf-mute-blind" companion
Deaf-mute blind companion, my word son.
says that some men turn off all their senses as soon as they get home, he can't hear what you say, he can't see what you do, and he doesn't say anything you want to know.
is basically a stone that can eat.
this marriage has no quality at all. If it goes on like this, a woman will fall apart.
if you don't want to force your woman to collapse, be sure to open your ears, eyes and mouth, listen carefully, watch carefully, communicate well, and accompany with your heart.
this is called husband and wife.
"Brothers are like brothers, wives." "shut up!"
of all a person's relationships, a partner should and must come first. Better than parents and children, better than friends.
if a brother is a brother, a wife is fate.
if necessary, I'd rather break my hand and foot than save my life.
so, if your wife has a serious conflict with your buddy, and you don't want a divorce, you can either convince your wife to accept the existence of your buddy, or your brother will protect your wife.
there is no third choice.
pay attention to the image
all long things test people. This is especially true in marriage.
she may be able to put up with your unshaven beard in the first year of marriage. Not in the seventh year.
when novelty and mystery wear out in time, and you no longer bring your own halo in her eyes, how can she fall in love with a dishevelled, fat, greasy foot-stinger?
where does the happiness of marriage come from without love?
praise your woman
Children need encouragement, as do women.
it's a pity that Chinese men are so bad at encouraging their wives that they are often derogatory when they open their mouth, and if they want to say something nice, they often say the opposite, as if a compliment on their wife's bank card will make them lose zero.
but she is clearly the woman you chose to marry. She is so bad that you still marry, are you blind, or are you not so good yourself?
sarcasm, sarcasm, ridicule, yelling, and disregard are all poisons of marriage.
praise and encouragement is the most quality and inexpensive marriage care product, which almost doubles your wife's happiness without cost or profit.
you deserve it. You have to use it.
Don't envy other people's wives
first, it's useless. Envy is not yours, is it?
second, it's not necessary.
most good-looking faces need RMB to support. I'm afraid you can't afford it.
pretty hands usually don't wash dishes, so do you wash the dishes in your house or do your mother wash them?
those who are younger than your wife may be more self-willed than she is, and you may not be able to stand it.
those who are more talented than your wife may also be more picky than her. I guess you can't handle it.
of course, young, beautiful, versatile,There must be girls who earn more and have no temper, but can they take a fancy to you?
marriages are generally fair. Fish looking for fish and shrimp looking for shrimp tortoise with son of a bitch, equal to each other in order to form a pair. Even if you are asked to choose again right now, you will probably have to find someone like your wife.
therefore, envy, regret and pondering are all asking for trouble, and it is serious to love your wife.
if you are willing to hug your wife from behind while washing vegetables and tell her a funny joke, you will find her smiling beautifully.