It is better to be poor and rich than to be educated.

writer Liang Xiaosheng once said:

upbringing is the nobility with the lowest threshold.

is also a family, leaving children the greatest wealth.

it is better to give children the best upbringing than to be poor and rich.

01

means that educating children begins with babies;

educating wives starts from the beginning of marriage.

Yan Zhitui believes that godson is like farming.

if you work hard to raise seedlings in spring, you can only harvest fruit in autumn.

people are the same. When they were young, they were single-minded;

when they grew up, their minds gradually became scattered;

by the time they got married, their bodies and personalities had already been stereotyped.

Yan's children have to be brought up alone from the age of five or six.

those who are diligent and easy to ask will soon be able to read the Analects of Confucius;

those with stupid qualifications can also read and know etiquette.

the same is true of ordinary people's homes:

the children of farmers learn to farm from their parents;

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the children of businessmen know the rules of business.

once you miss the best time, when the child grows up, you will learn nothing.

it will only be even more difficult to think of discipline at this time.

02

not afraid of being too strict, they are afraid of being too broad.

the ancients said, "Love is taught, strict and kind."

parents are loving and dignified, and only when children are in awe can filial piety be born.

the way of educating children, it is best to be between leniency and strictness, and to be upright.

if you don't have a good grasp of this degree, you'd rather be too strict than too broad.

as the saying goes, "strictness is love, breadth is harm."

when parents educate their children, they are most afraid of doting.

the child should have been severely admonished but rewarded for doing something wrong;

the child should have been seriously scolded, but failed to do so;

treat the requirements of the child's life as much as possible, but do not know how to abstain.

if this goes on, the child will eventually become a person of bad character.

many parents are worried that the godchild is too strict and it is easy to hurt the feelings between parents and children.

when children complain, parents will be ruthless.

the words of the Book of changes say: "Li, good luck."

all good children are controlled, and bear children are used to it.

strict parenting is ultimately for the good of the child.

if the parenting is too broad, it is easy to be out of order.

Children's neglect of discipline at home will inevitably lead to problems in society.

if you don't educate your children, there will always be someone to discipline you.

this is a price that neither you nor your child can afford.

03

there are things in words and things in deeds

as the ancients said, "if you are regular and sincere, you will be powerful without anger."

the dignity of parents is not established by keeping a straight face and lecturing people.

it is naturally formed by teaching by example and setting an example.

the family hexagram in the Book of changes says: "there are things in words, but constancy in deeds."

parents, as the head of the family, teach their children not to talk empty words.

only by matching words with deeds can the authority of parents be established.

when Su Shi was demoted to Huangzhou, he personally taught his eldest son Su Mai.

one day Su Mai asked his father the origin of Shizhong Mountain on the banks of Poyang Lake.

Father and son consulted many books and felt that the explanations in the books were unreliable.

instead of fooling his son, Su Shi took Su Mai to Shizhongshan for an on-the-spot investigation.

they found a naturally formed "stone orifice" in the mountains, and the wind blew like a bell.

not only understood the origin of Shizhongshan, but also left a masterpiece "the Story of Shizhongshan".

it was not difficult to take the children to climb the mountain.

it's just that most people don't bother and would rather turn to books to find a ready-made answer.

it is because of parents' laziness that widens the gap between children.