Is this something you want to tell me but you're afraid to tell me?

/December 2022

article /

Hello everyone, here is the wayward vice tweet, this new column "one small thing".

the text here could come from anyone, but it doesn't matter.

the only thing that matters is "there is one thing here, it belongs to you, but it is something you want to say and dare not say".

the "one little thing" column may be updated every day, or it may only be this time.

Ann is crooked, the writer is distracted, and the reader is happy.

here, the amount of reading doesn't matter.

just like, a tree hole does not need more than one audience.

I'm here, and you're here, that's enough.

# you ask me what is the saddest moment for a person.

I tell you that it is not the malicious verbal flirting of the taxi driver at 10 o'clock in the evening, or the embarrassment of the couple passing by on the school road. it's not when the bag ears are broken in the subway station known as "the subway station with the largest flow of people in China".

it was that day, after I got off the bus.

it's hard to meet someone who can talk to you about Jay Chou's song style before and after 2004, someone who can talk to you about Bei Dao's poems, someone who can talk to you about Guo Jingming's early fantasy novels and tiny times, and someone who can talk to you about new concepts, essays and budding magazines.

in the copilot position, I watched him walk a long way in the car without saying it, because I knew that this was the only time we could be together, and I hope the only time would last a little longer.

later, do you want me to take your car back to school? I didn't reply to you.

because I always remember seeing the silver ring on your left ring finger when I got on the bus.

see your message and delete it. I'd love to reply, you know.

lying curled up alone, I can't blame luck or luck, so I can only pretend not to see the message.

that was probably the hardest moment for me alone.

# empathy with you is false, want to hug you is true

eat the last mouthful of coconut milk black glutinous rice in the yellow bowl, refresh moments to see three or three say "never so helpless".

the San San in my heart has always been a happy guy who likes beauties, good food and dirty jokes.

the guy in my heart is a guy who can't sleep at 01:30 and can chat.

the third in my heart is a guy who picked up Grandpa Zhang Mao and said he wanted to invite him to dinner.

I don't want him to be unhappy.

"Why are you unhappy?"

"I can't graduate."

after hearing this answer, I began to feel a little remorseful. I shouldn't have asked him. Because I found that I couldn't help him, but now I feel like picking up something that I can't let go for a while. I want to run over and hug him and tell him it's okay, but I know it's impossible, it's not impossible to run there. It's impossible for me to make him feel like "really nothing".

in times of adversity, all the bad things are there, no one can pretend not to see, comfort sometimes does not play a practical role, emotion is sometimes worthless.

in that case, help him straighten out his train of thought and tell him what to do next.

the worst-case scenario is an one-year delay. "

"it's all right. I'm not completely sure yet. I'll wait for the school news. At most, I'll repeat the procedures at work. It's all right. Don't worry first." "

" I don't want to tell my family. I think they will be pissed to death. "

"it's all right, don't say it, don't say it, everyone's safety and health is enough."

I guess I said more than ten sentences of "nothing" in our chat record today, and the last time I separated the three words "nothing" with a space. Because I hope he can know that if a sentence can be read word by word, it has weight and its tone is firm.

I tried to use this trick to make him feel my heart, like shaking his shoulder and telling him, "it's okay, we're all here."

I don't know if he can feel it, and he doesn't go on asking, but that's it.

when it was dark, I went downstairs and bought half a watermelon. After coming back, I washed my hair and dried it on the balcony.

there is no sunset, cloudy days, and the watermelons are no longer cold.

if you want to find a place to put your story, you might as well come to the vice-push and we'll wait for you.